Monday, April 20, 2009

10 Things Every Woman Should Know -by Gary Watkins

My friend April's hubby, Gary, wrote this really great essay which not only expresses how deep his love is for his wife, but also provides great tips, from a Godly man's perspective, on how men want to be treated... Great read...


I was up late last night and my mind was swarming, but I couldn't notice how different I felt when I slipped into bed and watched my wife sleep. I became so grateful for so much. I don't know what others marriages are like, and I'm not sure what most of you single girls out there are aspiring to be for a man, but let me tell you that I couldn't be any happier and more at peace with my wife. So I just wanted to share with the rest of the girls out there how to really have an effect on a man, in the hopes that there would be more marriages out there like mine under the covering of what God has to offer.Here are 10 things you should know.....
1. It absolutely blesses a man when is wife is seen as a fun and personable woman who is genuinely liked by all his friends and family. Imagine life with someone who is everybody's favorite, or better yet contrast with being with someone who everyone hates to be around or feels is no good for you. I'm sure there are many men out there who can testify to both truths. To all the women out there, If you want to bless your man, be a beacon for love and gentleness to everyone.
2. It absolutely blesses me when my wife accepts the fact that I am sometimes a big kid. It's cool to every once and awhile talk about buying and air rifle at walmart just for fun, as ridiculous as it sounds. Every man that I've ever known has always been into child-like interests like remote control airplanes, video games, instruments, and collectibles. It's just in our nature, and it's so much fun to be with someone who won't make you feel stupid or lose respect for you because of our child-like interests. To all the women out there, understand that one of the greater things you can offer a man is recreational companionship, or at least be game to trying.
3. My mother always said that the one of the greatest blessings she could offer her children was to know that her parents were always in love with each other. So I grew up watching them hold and kiss each other every night when my dad would come home from work. In the same return my wife always puts pictures of us up on facebook and on her cell phone together and is writing her blogs about us etc.. It's a blessing to me when people see that she's crazy about me and that we have an exceptional marriage:) It makes me feel like I'm doing something right, and it feels great to have everyone know that I won her heart, and be inspired by it.To all the women out there, don't be afraid to be lovey-dovey. I know it sounds corny but it's an exceptional alternative to not doing anything at all.
4. April honors me, and by honor I mean respect. When I talk she listens. My cares genuinely become her own. She supports me in all that I do. She's not up for quarrel, and doesn't criticize me. I have to say that at least once a week when I think about it, I'm just blown away by how easy life is with her and just totally remember that I can totally live the rest of my life with this girl.To all the women out there, respect is on the top 3 requirements for any man to function well in life. It makes him feel more Godly, and it gives him strength and wisdom.
5. Don't let your man go hungry. I'm not talking about hunger for food. I'm talking about his hunger for you. It's every single man's fear that they will end up with an "I have headache" routine for the rest of his life. I have heard from many men what it's like to live in that pattern, and it's heartbreaking. I once heard from my Pastor once in North Carolina, that you can always tell how well a woman treats her man in private, by how he treats her in public (and vice versa of course). So when you guys see me playing with my wife's hair, holding her hand, opening her car door, and shamelessly embracing her...rest assured that my belly is full. I wish there were someway that I could help out all the rest of the guys in the world in this area.To all the women out there, if you ever want to be proud of anything in a relationship....be proud of this one thing. It all starts when you're single too, get a jump start on this perspective, and it will bring you joy.
6. Transparency is the key to clarity. April is very transparent with me. She doesn't hide or herself or hold out from me. What I see is what I get. She doesn't put up false intentions, she doesn't act like she's fine when she's not, and she doesn't make me work to try to understand what she's thinking. This makes me a better husband because my understanding of her body language, her aura, and her non verbal communication makes it easier for me to accept the first thing that comes to my mind about the situation, rather then wonder if I'm going crazy, or is she playing games, or is this a test, or, or ,or etc.etc.etc...To all the women out there, if you really want to see how much your man cares about you, let him see you for who you are. Clouding his understanding of you is a self-centered sport that only results in greater separation.
7. April is very forgiving. When you forgive someone you basically bring things back to their foundation and start over. Maybe I make mistakes, maybe I'll say something and wont do it, maybe sometimes I'll leave a mess and she'll have to pick it up....but at the end of the night she does not hold it over my head, and she forgives me and we begin over like my mistakes never happened, and we enjoy each other like.. all we ever knew was love. At the same time it's easy as cake to forgive forgiving people and when it's my turn, it's almost a joke to even consider not forgiving her.To all the women out there, holding onto the past is like holding onto fresh fruits and serving them after they are rotten. Only makes the body ill, and the eater is never going to want you to serve them anything again.
8. (In Humor) Believe it or not your man has managed to survive life before you. Yes woman is man's gift as a helper.....not a nag. I've seen nag throughout my studies, and my wife openly proclaims herself against it, and it makes me feel like I've got a jewel. Many girls want to supplement their men, but do so by nagging and nagging and sometimes harassing their man. This is not what God has designed. Because April does not nag me, the few words that she speaks hold greater value to me. If she nagged me all the time my life would be numb to her voice and her words, and my interest in what she has to say would decrease. I am so grateful that I do not have a nagging wife.To all the women out there, PLEASE do not fall into the American sub-culture of what a women "needs to do" in a relationship with a man. Men, do not need a nag. Be a rebel and flip the script on them. If you choose to nag, you will be exchanging it for a greater stress.
9. The best advice April and I got at our wedding party was "Don't take anyone's advice". April and I took that and ran with it. We make our own rules. We don't measure ourselves and our expectations to anyone. This is our life, our relationship, and we are the ones ultimately and foreverly affected by it. Because of all of this, it has increased our own creative ways of communicating which makes us more attentive to each other. I love April for joining with me in this. To all the women out there, April blesses me by keep our lives together...our lives together. She is not influenced or manipulated by anyone. This protects me and us from fiery darts that other relationships are pinned by. Making our relationship unique which results in a unique love, which is what we wanted.
10. April is the purest girl I have ever met. Growing up we all thought that she was naive, and "holier than thou", but now that I know the true April I realize what purity has to offer. Her pure outlook on love, God, friendship, ministry, nursing, and family absolutely blows my mind. I am a student of the human race and human behavior and this girl has boggled my mind over and over. She has a supernatural beauty because she is pure, which makes her invaluable, which makes her my mystic. There's nothing like being amazingly married to someone you are truly impressed by. It's one of her greatest and attractive qualities. April and I never had sex before marriage and I'm glad because keeping her pure is one of my greatest joys. Even now, I am protective of her because she now is under my umbrella or protection, now that she has left her father's care. Because I love her with her father's love I want to see her thrive in all that she can so she continues to feel and be different from the rest of the tainted world.To all the women out there, it's never too late for purity. Be compelled and inspired by it. Seeing the value it has in April's life brings me my greatest joy.These are just my thoughts that I wanted to share with the rest of the world as I was awake last night watching my soulmate rest in my bed.
Thanks for listening ya'll. Feel free to comment, tag, print out, forward or even discuss these topics for the betterment of God's plan in our lives.-Stay in the Fight

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