Wednesday, June 10, 2009

I Went to College For THIS???

Meghan, Gi Gi, Rob and I in February 2008

I finally found a little complaint-laden blog I wrote in 2006 and posted on MySpace about my experience working my first full time job out of college (be forewarned class of '09, the real world ain't pretty). I figured I'd share it with you all... enjoy!

Right now, this is just a job. If I advance any higher in this company, then this would be my career. And uh … well, if this were my career, I’d have to throw myself in front of a train.” ~Jim, from the “Health Care” episode of “The Office”

Yeah, so I hate my job. I mean, at this point, if I looked into a crystal ball to see my future and saw that I was still working here 5 years from now, I’d probably go hang myself from one of the stupid air conditioning vents at work that has left me with a mild case of hypothermia every week for the past month. Or maybe just throw myself in front of a train.

The most disappointing thing about my current situation is that last year this time, all I wanted was “a full-time job with benefits that paid decently”. Perhaps when I said my prayers, I should’ve added, “and won’t make me so depressed that I fantasize about being sick just to stay home.” I don’t want to seem unappreciative, but… well, I don’t appreciate this job. I detest it. I sit in a stupid beige half-a-cubicle made of snap together pieces using a computer that hasn’t been new since “Dawson’s Creek” was a hit on the WB. I have a BA in English, yet all I ever write is memos… and emails regarding those memos. And my boss (who will heretofore be referred to as Evil) is a wretched combination of lazy and incompetence and is pretty much useless… to the world. Evil has managed to piss off most of the staff, violate a number of confidentiality rules, and do absolutelty no work in 8 months, all while sporting a collection of brightly colored suits last seen on Whitley Gilbert on “A Different World.”

The only positives in this abyss of negatives are my co-worker friends. They have been there for me when I cried, have made me laugh, and been there for me again when I inevitably cried again. Gi Gi has been my best friend for years, and has amazingly remained so even though I got her this job in the third circle of hell. I love her so much and I might just go insane when she goes on maternity leave next month. But then sweet Meghan wouldn’t let me go crazy. At least not without her. She’s such an incredible person: animal lover, socially conscious, and she’s hot but isn’t conceited about it. And then there’s Robyn. My constant co-worker since ’01, her witticisms got me through inane envelope stuffing at the CNS [my on-campus student worker job], and inane memo writing in the third circle. Wow. That last sentence just made me realize that 5 years and a degree later, I’m still doing pretty much the same stupid work. I went to college for THIS?!?


Unknown said...

Now that's hilarious. Not your pain, but... Whitley? Really? Lol good stuff.

Alisha De Freitas said...

Thanks... I'm not exaggerating either. Her wardrobe hadn't been updated since Clinton was inaugurated. Yup, bad times...

Dina said...

This was too funny!

Alisha De Freitas said...

He he he... Dina, our job, while tormenting us, has inspired some pretty good complaining rants.

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