Thursday, October 7, 2010

Be My Guest: "To All My Ladies" by Lakeyia J. Medina

Be my guest, be my guest, put my blog to the test... I heart guest posts because I can continue to be lazy and you all can hear someone else's voice besides mine, which is good because I am admiottedly just a tad too sarcastic at times. Just a tad.

So enjoy this piece about how we ladies really need to stick together more and stop tearing each other down.

Let me briefly speak to all my lovely ladies out there because this has been a sincere concern of mine for the past several months.

***Disclaimer*** What I am about to express is not about pointing fingers and blame shifting. I believe this is an overall problem affecting us women of worth and if it's a problem for some then it's a problem for all. We are all sisters and journeying through life together. We are all to be our "sister's keeper". Also while this is a concern that men deal with as well, as my mama always used to say "Don't worry about the next person, deal with yourself first." So I'll leave the men up to the men. ***Disclaimer***

 Ok on a serious note. Why is it that women cannot get along with each other?

Why do we (generally speaking) have more of a 'comfortability' in greeting, speaking, and interacting with the opposite sex, then with our very own gender? I find this very troubling because overall we are created sociable creatures and yet our sociability seems to be more fluent with the opposite sex. I seriously want to know what is the problem?

Now this topic has been circulating around for years because this seems to be an ongoing problem, and the usual answers are 
"I don't get the same hostility from men that I receive from women."
"Women can be haters."
"I don't have time to deal with all the issues women have."

Granted, these are very real and honest answers. However why does it even have to be this way? =-( I mean none of us are perfect and we all have issues, but why can't we all just get along?? Now I'm not saying that we all need to be BBFs, but can we at least be SINCERELY cordial with one another? Notice I had to put the adjective "sincerely" in there because women, we'll smile in each others face and appear cordial on the outside but underneath we can't stand each other. And that's not even the worst part....the worst part is THERE'S NO REASON we can't stand each other!!!! I guess simply because we are females. Hmmmmm.....or is there a reason?

Is it because we believe there is a shortage of available men and when another female comes into the 'lair' that has the qualities that are appealing to men, we whip out the 'claws'? Ladies help me out! Is this a survival of the fittest?!?!?

I mean I'm not going to lie, when I was younger I used to participate in the whole "I don't like her without a cause" bit. Back then it seemed to be the thing to do. However when I hit 8th grade and the same attitude was thrown back in my face, I got to see how it felt to be on the 'receiving unwarranted hate side', and I 'put away childish things'. However this same attitude has managed to not only follow us throughout our early years but even into our 20s, 30s, 40s, and so on. Worst yet, this wordly attitude is even rampant within the house of God. LADIES COME ON!!!!!!!!!!!!! Do we really think that God is not going to see right through us!?!?!?!?!? Yea we can hide it underneath our 'mask' (though some can't even do that well), but ALL things (inside and out) are laid bare before the Lord and we will be judged for it. God was NOT playing when He commanded us to "Love our neighbor as ourselves." He who says he loves God but cannot love his brother (or sister), is a LIAR. How can you love God whom you have NOT seen and love your brother (or sister) who you have seen (and see on a daily basis)?

Ladies this spirit of discord, jealousy, hatred, and pride is not something that any of us are immune to. I'm not going to sit here and say that a 'hating' thought toward a female never enters my mind. However we are to CAST down those vain imaginations. When it usually attempts to enter my mind, I just ask myself "Lakeyia has she done anything for you to dislike her?" And majority of the time the answer is a "NO." We have to also start realizing that it is the ENEMY that tries to stir up those godless thoughts, but we need to have a bucket of water waiting by to drown out that flame. 

Now if she HAS done something to offend you, why can't we just be woman enough to go and "if at all possible be at PEACE with all men (and women)"? We have no problem letting that offense fester and boil over, but when it comes to confronting the offending party (so as to release any negative vibes), we hesitate.

Look ladies, I am in NO way a perfect person, and I do things that may irritate people. However you better believe, I'm not going to continue to sit idle while you express your dislike towards me through petty actions (ex: not reciprocating a greeting, etc). I know that allowing petty things like that will start to sow seeds of bitterness in my heart and it's not going down like that! I already have to deal with all the issues this world throws at me! Either you are going to approach me and let me know my wrong so I can apologize (and the beef can be squashed), or I'm coming to you in attempts to make the wrong right. TRUST, you will have to confront your issue. All I desire is to be at peace in my spirit that I tried to do all I could to make peace with my fellowman/sister.

Look, we all are dealing with things. And we all deal with people who deal with things (and sometimes direct those things toward us). Beloved, let's not add to the stress by dealing with things that are not even existent. If you have NO just cause to 'dislike' someone, why put that unnecessary fat on your plate? It's bad enough what we deal with in this world as women period...let's not be our own worst enemy.

Love you all very much!

And we love you, too, Keyia! If you want to check out more from her, go to her YouTube page here. Or check out her group My Brother's Keeper on Facebook.


Lakeyia J. Medina said...

First off....I AM HONORED!!! Second even though the 'Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants' photo sufficed (I was looking for that close bonding between sisters feel). I LOVE the 'Girlfriends' photo. Thirdly...I AM HONORED!!! LoL I appreciate you for this! Fourthly I was just so bothered by the situation *ahem*, that I had to put my thoughts on internet. That button that you have up is SO true. Sisters/Friends are better than therapy! Even the Bible confirms the blessing of a friend (Prov 18:24). I just pray we women realize that. Love you friend! =-D

Alisha De Freitas said...

Love you, too, Girl! I decided to post it when you got positive feedback on FB and when I "shared" it, people responded, too.

And it's a great message. We need each other! xoxoxo

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