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Thursday, October 6, 2011
Posted by Alisha De Freitas at 6:54 PM
"Ladies, your man is nastier than you ever imagined. Your man has been watching porno since he was twelve years old. He has pornographic images in his head and wants to relive some of that s*** before he drops dead. That's right ladies, get up on it. Listen to what the f*** I'm going to say. Just because he came, don't mean you made him come."
~Chris Rock, "Kill The Messenger"
Oh my, there is much truth in comedy. I actually find the funniest jokes are based in reality, which is why I'm still such a huge "Seinfeld" fan after all these years. Anyway, the statement above, funny in a "shaking my head" kind of way, is very true. Brutally honest, in fact.
And I believe Rock has punchlined his way into revealing one of the biggest problems with porn. Like a mental case of genital herpes, it stays with you. Forever.
When I told a friend I was going to be doing this post, he discouraged me from doing it. And I totally understand why. I'm pretty sure some of my readers clicked on this link, and after reading the above quote, with not one, but two asterisk-filled words featured on George Carlin's infamous list of seven, began their own head shaking in earnest. Well, my bad. But again, this blog is a melding of the "sacred and profane". So skip this one. But back to my friend. He said he wasn't really into porn (not every guy is... just like not every girl isn't), and only watched it a few times back when he was in the 10th grade. But THAT is the point of this post. I'll skip the salaciousness, how porn demeans the actors- turning them into meat. I'll bypass discussing the spread of disease, along with how it separates sex from love. No, I want to point out how it remains stamped in your mind, so much so that my thirty-something friend who doesn't even like porn can still remember viewing it over fifteen years ago.
I have a friend, a very good friend, who I remember sneaking into my brother's room with back when we were about 16 or 17. We would go in there on occasion because he always had something two bored upperclass high school girls could use. A huge stereo system or a few bucks we could "borrow" to use at the corner store. One particular boring afternoon, we stumbled upon his stash of dirty mags. And by stumble, I mean, literally stumble because he had left them out in a pile along with copies of Rolling Stone and Spin. Both of us being very curious, picked up a mag and stared, laughing at the frankly unattractive couple in the middle of what should be a very private moment. "Look at her hair!" I said (yeah, I actually honed in on her feathered, permed do before taking stock of the sex). "EWWW... look at his face! Gross, Li! He looks like a dirty old man!" That was her first impression.
I bring this story up because I remember the two "models" to this day. He with his reddish-brown hair and thick beard. Her with the 1980s neon pumps on. And nothing else. I saw that magazine about twelve years ago. And I STILL remember it. I might not have mental herpes, but I definitely have some pox scars on my mind. I had rubbed up against some porn, gotten itchy with curiosity, scratched, and still have the marks to show for it.
I feel very bad for the ladies Chris is talking to. Think about that... making love to your man, sharing your body with him, giving yourself freely... to your husband... who is mentally doing some strange woman... repeatedly... augh. They've had a love affair going since he was in middle school. Might be the longest relationship he's ever had.
Chris' joke is humorous, but the story behind it is not. It's hurtful. Viewing porn is a message that can't be killed.